Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Seattleites Love Cupcakes. Who Knew?

Seattle is certainly known for its coffee, with companies like Starbucks and Seattle’s Best being founded here, but did you know that there’s a cupcake craze here too?

There are dozens of boutique cupcake stores scattered across the city like, ahem, sprinkles on a cupcake, and I feel no shame or guilt in admitting that I’ve already sampled the goods at several of them. There’s Cupcake Royale, a cupcake and coffee house combo that offers seasonal specialties like the Wild Huckleberry cupcake; Trophy Cupcakes, which earned the enthusiastic approval of Martha Stewart herself; Wink Cupcakes, which enticed me through its doors with the smell of freshly baked cake, and which also offers Cupcake Happy Hour and the Wink VIP Club; and many other options to satisfy Seattle’s cupcake fiends – myself included.

Each cupcake boutique – that’s right, they’re boutiques, not stores – has something yummy to tickle my tastebuds, but I have to say that Cupcake Royale gets it right each and every time – and I believe I know their secret. It’s a crucial element in the cupcake-eating experience that I’ve termed “the frosting-to-cake ratio”. You see, if you have too much frosting then it gets all over your nose as you bite into the cupcake and it also creates too much sliminess in the mouth; however, if you have too little frosting then the cake gets too dry and it’s just no fun to eat. The correct ratio of frosting to cupcake gives you the perfect biting experience and also the smooth and creamy mouthfeel (my new favorite culinary term) that makes cupcake-eating so dreamy. Cupcake Royale gives me the perfect ratio with each and every sweet little organic cupcake; plus, their slogan is “legalize frostitution”. How can you not like a company that dishes up cupcakes, coffee, and wit?

So, when you’re in Seattle, be sure to have a cupcake or two with your coffee. You can even attend the annual Cupcake Camp or purchase a cupcake for breast cancer research. Your flavor can be as exotic as Tomato Soup or White Chocolate Pretzel, or as tried-and-true as Triple Chocolate or Red Velvet. You can consume organic cupcakes, vegan cupcakes, healthy cupcakes, mini cupcakes (but why would you want to?), showy cupcakes, and even XXX-rated adult cupcakes. Just be sure to get some sachariferous treat.

“Sweets to the sweet; farewell!”


Anonymous said...

Hilarious writing! Frosting to cake ratio, I never thought about such. What a slogan! Love you

Anonymous said...

Nice to hear that you are enjoying yourself so thoroughly! ;)

Your fans appreciate the sacchariferous allusions and the Shakespearean quotes. Your blog is "a hit, a very palpable hit": you beautifully "suit the action to the word, the word to the action", and "hold as 'twere the mirror up to nature". :)

Keep up the great writing!


dangerousaphrodite said...

I love your writing!! And now I am very hungry for a cupcake :)

Kristen said...

Thanks for the encouragement everyone. I'm glad you all like the big, funny words and the Shakespeare quotes. Some of your comments are like little works of art themselves!

Anonymous said...

I love cupcakes! Love your descriptive, flavorful sketches. Olde Town girl

Anonymous said...

wow! had not read this article till today, 1 dec. somehow it slipped past my notice.
can't write long though. . .jab's starving now!

Kristen said...

@jab: do they have cupcakes over there?