Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Eating at Serious Pie is a Classy Adventure




Serious Pie is not your typical pizza joint. When I entered its cozy ambiance after getting pummeled by yesterday’s deranged windstorm, I felt like Frodo returning to his hobbit-home after saving Middle Earth and enduring all sorts of cruel trials instigated by Peter Jackson. Fire crackled, soft lights glowed, earthy smells tempted, and gentle music flowed. I was ready to forget all about that evil windstorm and poor Frodo getting bundled up in narcotic she-spider saliva.

At my communal table, where I sat beside a married couple visiting from Anchorage, I enjoyed a light, tasty feast. First I had the Tuscan kale with pine nuts and parmesan – with a surprise burst of citrus to boot! – while listening to my tablemates regale me with stories of man-eating polar bears and -100° temps. Middle Earth indeed; just venture to Alaska! For my happy hour mini-pie I chose the delicata squash, roasted garlic, and gorgonzola lucifero pizza simply because I had to try “Lucifer’s gorgonzola”. Oh man, that crust was crisp, that squash was creamy, and that cheese added just the right tang. A far cry from the greasy vittles of Pizza Hut. Other creative options you can explore to satisfy your upscale pizza cravings include Yukon potato and rosemary, chanterelle mushrooms and truffle cheese, and pumpkin, pork belly, and pistachio. I will never be able to tolerate Elven bread again after these sumptuous morsels.

That was all good, but the dessert truly ruled: olive oil cake topped with spiced apples and soft whip, surrounded by jewels of bright red cranberries. It was the perfect windy autumn day desert. The cake was moist, and the cranberries were tart explosives ricocheting around in my mouth. My palette was so enraptured, I was seriously tempted to publicly lick my plate. Instead, I said goodbye (good riddance?) to my tablemates and received the odd – and slightly offensive – recommendation that I apply for a job at BP. Since the guy worked for an oil company in Alaska, I didn’t tell him what I really thought of that little piece of advice, but between us, I’d rather face the Eye of Sauron.

And one pizza joint to rule them all!

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

When daddy and mama come to visit you, we want to eat at "Serious Pie." Laughed at your article. Love your writing. Write a book! Love, mama

Anonymous said...

Now I'm in the mood for pizza! The Oracle of Delphi couldn't have voiced your blog any better.

papito

Anonymous said...

"My Precious!!!" :)

Anonymous said...

Sounds absolutely divine. Can't wait to try it! More excellent prose!

Anonymous said...

nice ending. that last little line brought it all together, wrapped it up and broke it off. . .maybe one swift stroke of gimli's broad ax.

jab

Kristen said...

@ jab: Ha! I like that last line - "one swift stroke of gimli's broad ax". The pen might be mightier than the sword, but not gimli's ax!

Anonymous said...

man, you keep one uppin' me!
but, i'll gladly take 2nd place in a writing contest that has onie registered.

jab